6 hawks one of which killed something as I drove past.

Also, a random llama.

-dean

Huh, I’m surprised I hadn’t posted this story before. happened ages ago but I still remember.

So rob and I are at the Edmonton Public Library on the computers there checking to see if they have the new Hawking book or something.
“Watch this” says Rob as hits the degauss button.
Because the library computers are always on, the monitors are totally charged and they do that crazy color wobble thing for a long time after you degauss. Anyway, what we didn’t take into account was the fact that all the surrounding computers haven’t been discharged in forever as well, so they were also affected by the strong magnetic field of rob hitting that degauss button. So all the monitors in the row made that BWOOAOR Electrical/mechanical noise and all the screens went nutty colored for a few seconds.
So then this 80 year old lady sitting next to us is naturally surprised by the fact that her screen suddenly went into some sort of timewarp or something and she exclaims
“OH MY SHIT!”
funniest old lady quote ever.

-dean

words can never hurt me… But I’m not so sure about the sticks being able to break my bones. I mean, if it’s small enough that you’d classify it as a stick as opposed to a log, could you really generate enough force with a stick to break bones? Wouldn’t the stick break first? I’m talking a stick here by the way, not a baseball bat which has been lathe crafted from the hardest wood they can readily find and then compressed and treated to be as hard as possible. But just a stick, that you like pick up off the ground after it fell off a tree. I’m not convinced that’d break any bones.

Lies.

-dean

Wednesdays are measured in birds. (I realize it may say i’m posting this on thursday, but until I go to sleep or it changes to friday, whichever comes first, it’s still Wednesday for me.) Some wednesdays are Yodelling Yellow-headed Blackbird days. Some wednesdays are elusive little blue bird that I can’t quite identify days.

You see, on Wednesday, I usually get suckered into taking Vanessa to Tofield for her singing lessons. I don’t mind so much as she pays for gas n’ car tune-ups n’ stuff, I get an hour to doodle while she sings, (she’s pretty good I should record her for you sometime.) and most importantly I get to drive through a Ducks unlimited Bird sanctuary en route (at least on the route I take.) Today was a 12 hawk day. Why? Well, because I saw 12 hawks. One of ‘em, I named him fencepost, cause he was sitting on a fencepost, was about a meter long from beak to tailfeather tip. I’d have taken a picture but my delightful energizer batteries have this awesome habit of not working whenever I need them.

Did I say delightful and awesome? I meant disappointing and awful. Basically, on the day you charge them up, they’re totally awesome and you pretty much can’t discharge them no matter how much activity you throw at them. But two days later, regardless of how much or how little you’ve used them, they’re completely discharged. Not only that, but the batteries that you charged up at the same time and didn’t even put into any sort of electronics, and have been sitting on the shelf completely untouched for the last 2 days? yeah… also discharged. Energizer 2500mah nickle metal hydride rechargeables. Totally awesome for a day, but they get tired fast. Kindof like new hobbies, new years resolutions, internet fads, and a hundred other things I could think of if I wasn’t just typing this out stream-of-consciousness. Point is, I can’t totally tell you to steer clear of these things because for a day, they’re the greatest battery ever made.

Back to birds-of-prey. If a bird that eats other birds and small animals is a bird-of-prey. Is a bird that gets eaten by a hawk a “bird-of-predator”? or is it a bird-of-random-seed-and-little-bugs-n’-stuff”? Birds of prey are generally pretty easy to spot, as they like to sit way the hell up on top of telephone poles, tall dead trees, Stop signs and what have you. They do this so that they can survey the most area and find a tasty morsel scurrying from rock to burrow. anyway, they kind of stick out and one always feels compelled to go “hey, look a hawk” because, even though they’re easy to spot, they’re not usually all that commonplace. the past few weeks have had me going “wow, I never thought I’d see 7 hawks in one little trip through the backcountry” So today, even if I didn’t get a blurry picture of a hawk looking uncomfortable as I gawk at it out the window of my car (gawking at hawks, there’s gold in them thar hills I tells ya.), was still a 12 hawk day.

-dean

7-eleven person: here, have a free P’eatzza
Scott: I don’t want it.
7-eleven person: but it’s free!
Scott: But I don’t want it!
7-eleven person: TAKE IT! It’s Free!
Scott: NO! I don’t want it.
7-eleven person: TAKE IT!!
Scott: Fine. (Takes it, Throws it on the floor)
7-eleven Person: What’d you do that for?
Scott: I said I didn’t want it, and you forced me to take it.
7-eleven person: that was mean, it was free!
Scott: But I didn’t want it
7-eleven person: But it was free!
Me: Scott, have some free cancer!
Scott: No I don’t want Cancer!
Me: But It’s Free!
Scott: Fine.
Me: HAHA now you have free cancer.
Scott: I’m a fool.

-dean

So my goal for the year is to watch all of the top 100 AFI films I haven’t seen. Guess i’ll do the list. Reds I haven’t seen.

1. CITIZEN KANE (1941)
2. CASABLANCA (1942)
3. THE GODFATHER (1972)
4. GONE WITH THE WIND (1939)
5. LAWRENCE OF ARABIA (1962)
6. THE WIZARD OF OZ (1939
7. THE GRADUATE (1967)
8. ON THE WATERFRONT (1954)
9. SCHINDLER’S LIST (1993)
10. SINGIN’ IN THE RAIN (1952)
11. IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE (1946)
12. SUNSET BOULEVARD (1950)
13. THE BRIDGE ON THE RIVER KWAI (1957)
14. SOME LIKE IT HOT (1959)
15. STAR WARS (1977)
16. ALL ABOUT EVE (1950)
17. THE AFRICAN QUEEN (1951)
18. PSYCHO (1960)
19. CHINATOWN (1974)
20. ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO’S NEST (1975)
21. THE GRAPES OF WRATH (1940)
22. 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (1968)
23. THE MALTESE FALCON (1941)
24. RAGING BULL (1980)
25. E.T. THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL (1982)
26. DR. STRANGELOVE (1964)
27. BONNIE AND CLYDE (1967)
28. APOCALYPSE NOW (1979)
29. MR. SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON (1939)
30. THE TREASURE OF THE SIERRA MADRE (1948)
31. ANNIE HALL (1977)
32. THE GODFATHER PART II (1974)
33. HIGH NOON (1952)
34. TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD (1962)
35. IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT (1934)
36. MIDNIGHT COWBOY (1969)
37. THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES (1946)
38. DOUBLE INDEMNITY (1944)
39. DOCTOR ZHIVAGO (1965)
40. NORTH BY NORTHWEST (1959)
41. WEST SIDE STORY (1961)
42. REAR WINDOW (1954)
43. KING KONG (1933)
44. THE BIRTH OF A NATION (1915)
45. A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE (1951)
46. A CLOCKWORK ORANGE (1971)
47. TAXI DRIVER (1976)
48. JAWS (1975)
49. SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS (1937)
50. BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID (1969)
51. THE PHILADELPHIA STORY (1940)
52. FROM HERE TO ETERNITY (1953)
53. AMADEUS (1984)
54. ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONT (1930)
55. THE SOUND OF MUSIC (1965)
56. M*A*S*H (1970)
57. THE THIRD MAN (1949)
58. FANTASIA (1940)
59. REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE (1955)
60. RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK (1981)
61. VERTIGO (1958)
62. TOOTSIE (1982)
63. STAGECOACH (1939)
64. CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND (1977)
65. THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS (1991)
66. NETWORK (1976)
67. THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE (1962)
68. AN AMERICAN IN PARIS (1951)
69. SHANE (1953)
70. THE FRENCH CONNECTION (1971)
71. FORREST GUMP (1994)
72. BEN-HUR (1959)
73. WUTHERING HEIGHTS (1939)
74. THE GOLD RUSH (1925)
75. DANCES WITH WOLVES (1990)
76. CITY LIGHTS (1931)
77. AMERICAN GRAFFITI (1973)
78. ROCKY (1976)
79. THE DEER HUNTER (1978)
80. THE WILD BUNCH (1969)
81. MODERN TIMES (1936)
82. GIANT (1956)
83. PLATOON (1986)
84. FARGO (1996)
85. DUCK SOUP (1933)
86. MUTINY ON THE BOUNTY (1935)
87. FRANKENSTEIN (1931)
88. EASY RIDER (1969)
89. PATTON (1970)
90. THE JAZZ SINGER (1927)
91. MY FAIR LADY (1964)
92. A PLACE IN THE SUN (1951)
93. THE APARTMENT (1960)
94. GOODFELLAS (1990)
95. PULP FICTION (1994)
96. THE SEARCHERS (1956)
97. BRINGING UP BABY (1938)
98. UNFORGIVEN (1992)
99. GUESS WHO’S COMING TO DINNER (1967)
100. YANKEE DOODLE DANDY (1942)

Godfather II is yellow because I fell asleep during it, so I’ll have to watch it again. I guess that’s not bad, I’ve seen about half of them. If anyone wants to rent anything on the list I haven’t seen and invite me over, I’m game. Otherwise lemme know you if wanna see something and I’ll put it on my ziplist http://www.zip.ca and call you up and tell you to come over when it gets here.

-dean

[image:537:l] So I had some spare paint from that Macquarium project, and some spare penis envy from the DS lite release. So, a little scotch tape, an exacto-knife and some spraypaint is all you kids at home need to play along and custom paint your very own DS. I didn’t take process shots because It was just sortof a spur of the moment thing. but basically you wrap the whole DS in transparent tape and then cut out the shape of… whatever you want to paint, then just spray the whole area down with a spraycan and you too can sport your very own CanaDS.

-dean

update: hey lookit me i’m on DSfanboy http://www.dsfanboy.com/2006/09/18/ds-phat-mod-shows-patriotism/

[image:536:l] Just in case you missed it. I totally beat Super Ghouls n’ Ghosts. Finally. THEN, I made a big show of it and made Steph and Vanessa come watch the end-credits with me. Then I made Steph take my picture as I posed with the completed “The End…?” screen still visible on the DS.
THEN, I posted the picture on the internet for all to see. Clearly I require some sort of affirmation that I didn’t just waste like… a week or so, learning how to precisely double jump at the right time to shoot the stupid red gargoyles in their stupid stupid faces.

-dean

[thumb:535:l] So, I shaved one side of my moustache and had Steph help me pluck the other side with tweezers. Here’s a time-lapsed photograph of my moustache reaching the average person’s 5 o’clock shadow length. Adjusted for czech/irish blood that translates to about 5 day shadow. I’d have taken a longer length of photos but;

1) it’s a pain in the neck (literally) to take these photos and I need steph’s help to do it, so I was kindof annoying her for the past week “hey steph drop what you’re doing and take a photo of my tardstache.

2) I said I’d grow it until the plucked side started to poke through. Looks like it’s doin’ that, so mission accomplished.

3) on day seven I get a big zit right in the middle of my lip and that’s all you’d end up staring at after that point I think…

so click the thumbnail and watch the fullsized animation… it’s about 2 megs though, just warnin’ you.

I want my moustache to grow, I want my moustache to grow, I want my moustache to grow, BUT ONLY ON ONE SIDE!!
-dean

Dear Internet,

What does the Q in Q-tip stand for? I have my suspicions.

all my love,
-dean
________________
Dear Dean,

As you have probably guessed, the “Q” stands for “quality”.
The product was originally called “Baby Gays” and in 1926 was changed to Q-tips Baby Gays. Later the Baby Gays was dropped all together.

right back at you,
Wikipedia.