Buy Light, Assemble light, find extension cord, plug in light, clean closet, lay down dropsheet, mask mask mask mask, open painttray/ disposable liner set, assemble paint roller, locate something to pry open paintcan with, open paintcan, pour pour paint into tray, remember I need painting clothes, locate painting clothes, don painting gear, roll paint onto roller, enter closet, start painting.

BREAK THE FUCKING HANDLE OF THE CHEAPASS ROLLER YOUR DAD BOUGHT AT WAL-MART, HAVE ROLLER SPIN BACK AND HIT YOU IN THE FACE.

Clean clean clean, yourself, put away paintgear because the store won\’t be open to buy a new roller for the next 10 hours

GODDAMN….

-Dean

The closets are pretty grungy here, so I decided to paint them today. 73 lights in my home, and no lights in the walk-in closet. I had to buy a halogen flood worklight from Home Hardware. I like having home hardware right across the street. I think I might turn into a wood shop kinda guy, constantly building birdhouses and crap in my livery stable. If I ever buy a dremel rotary tool, you\’ll know I\’ve crossed the point of no-return.

-Dean

Gregg and Scott are Champions of moving. I just thought I\’d mention that. Gregg Kindly drove a load of stuff down and loaded and unloaded everything while he was SICK. What a guy! Scott… well… Scott managed not to be at the liquor store long enough to help me build a shelf and move some stuff, so that was pretty cool too.

-Dean

If you\’re bored, Wander around your house and count how many lights there are. Like… built in light fixtures, not lamps. Count the actual bulbs in the fixture. like if it\’s a hanging chandelier thing, and there are 5 bulbs in it, then that light has 5. Then post that number here.

I bet the number\’s not 73. Cause that\’s how many lights there are in my house. And I have to replace them all with those expensive energy efficient fluorescent bulbs that go in regular sockets.

-Dean

I am officially in Vegreville still a few odds n\’ ends I have to go back to the city and clean up, but 90% here.

That means, My NES is hooked up and Scott\’s been duckhunting. Power and water\’s all good. My telephone is hooked up (780)632-2424 if you\’re inclined to call. But most importantly, DSL! Woo! Back online.

But I\’ve got a bit of work work to do then I\’ll update again with Setting up the house stories that I\’m sure you\’re all dying to hear.

-Dean

Hey kids, Just a heads up, I\’m moving most of my stuff today. My phone and DSL and such, won\’t be hooked up in Vegreville until Monday (hopefully monday). So if I\’m not around…. well… now you know why. If you\’re feeling bored today (Saturday October 18th) and feel like helping me move stuff, Give me a call, 424-0775.

\”Pray for ill face\”

-Dean

Dean Welsh: Make me some food, George.
George Mach: What kind of food would you like?
Dean:Something sandwich-like, but not a sandwich… Unless it\’s got lots of sprouts.
George: Spouts are bad.
Dean:But goooooood.
George:No bad. E.coli.
Faecal coliforms.
Salmonella.
gastroenteritis.
Dean:All sounds delicious
ESPECIALLY the fecal coliforms. I want me some sprouts really badly now, but we don\’t have any and safeway\’s already closed.
George:go pick some clover from your back yard. it\’s the same.
Dean:it\’s all dead.
I want alfalfa sprouts though.
George:Haha… alfalfa\’s like the worst sprout out there for microbes.
Dean:You keep saying \”worst\”. but you really mean \”best\”.
George:Oh, did I say worst? I meant the absolute rottenest in quality.
Dean:So if it\’s the \”rottenest in quality\” for Microbes. Then it\’s microbe free. I don\’t want microbe free sprouts. That\’s where the flavour comes from.
that\’s flavour county.
Flavour LIVES there.
It\’s flavour\’s HOME.
If I were flavour, I\’d retire and move to microbia.
George:Hehe… don\’t say I didn\’t warn you. One day, the asian farmer that grows that shit in Edmonton will forget to wash his hands after using the shitter, and he\’ll go back to harvesting his sprouts. And you\’re gonna get it.
You\’re gonna have the runs so bad, they\’ll call it a fricking marathon… a diarrheathon.
Dean:That\’s just what the flavorotlogists tell the peasants. to keep them flavour ignorant.
George:But alfalfa tastes like crap. If you\’re gonna eat sprouts, at least go for sunflower sprouts.
Dean:Whatever you say Captain \”I can\’t taste it if it\’s not covered in hotsauce\”
George:The more the better.
Hotsauce opens your taste buds.
It makes them more sensitive to flavour molecules.
It makes them so sensitive, they can taste the flavour atoms!
Dean:Sounds like witchdoctory to me. You\’re a cargo cult flavour taster, aren\’t you?
George:You\’re right. I\’m a cultist. I\’m a heretic. Burn me… burn me…
Dean:You\’ve already burned yourself by living in the flavour desert of non-sprout lovingness.
George:you mean flavour dessert! Yum.
Dean:Sounds like you\’ve been indoctrinated by those flavouologists I mentioned earlier. You can go on calling your cardboard a \”flavour dessert\”, but it\’s all in your brainwashed mind my misguided friend, all in your mind.
George:But how do you know that you haven\’t been brainwashed to think that I\’ve been brainwashed? And that really my cardboard flavour dessert isn\’t really the REAL flava country? huh? er… I mean, my cardboard flavour dessert IS the real flava…
Dean:Because I\’ve done the flavour science my friend. Flavour is the truth and the truth shall set you free.
George:Fine. I concede the point. This still doesn\’t solve your dilemma (much to my delight) of your lack of sprouts.
Dean:I hope you Rot in your flavour-free homeland.
George:Canada?
Dean:Or you know… that desert.

-Dean

Topical art doodle for the week.

-Dean

Holy cow, Spammers have gotten to be in such a hurry to send me junkmail that they\’re forgetting to make sure thier Find and replace code works.

check this out.

For all of you who are unsure how they manage to send out all those personalized spam e-mails. See all that part that is surrounded by greater than and less than signs? If this were a real life junkmail, that bit would be in a suspiciously different font as if a secretary typed your name in with a typewriter. Only in this case, the secretary isn\’t even needed. They have a little program that fills all that info in with information they\’ve harvested from you. (like when you entered that contest to win a free trip to tahiti)

-Dean

Dean Welsh:I like this plan of filthy richness. Tell me more. Maybe I should put more practice into actually colorin\’ stuff and live the lavish life of luxury a colorist lives.
Trish Mulvihill: Ah, yes…. so lavish. Peanut butter on toast everyday…. nothing but the finest in superhero t-shirts to adorn oneself with…
Dean: YOU can afford to TOAST bread? You\’ve hit the bigtime!
Trish: hahaha, when I can afford the bread itself!
Dean: ooooof boo. my stupid Pita molded. I just came back from a foiled sandwich making attempt.
Trish:I always put the bread in the fridge after a couple of days…. it keeps ALOT longer. There\’s no way I\’d be able to finish it without it going moldy first, otherwise. (That was very Martha Stewart of me.)
Dean: haha, I just learned that trick from my friend. (I used to eat a lot of bread so it didn\’t matter before) This time though, I left my Pita out for only 3 days! (because I ate sandwiches every day.) But it molded fast. Tragedy. Dismay. I feel like wearing black…. and writing bad poetry.
Trish: aww dude…. there\’ll be other pitas
Dean:Vile Bread, Molding away, I am as a molested fly. powerless. Lacking the means to soar.

WOE!
Trish: That was good…. almost Shakespearean
I could picture you cradling the molding mass in your hand, as MacBeth (?) cradled a skull or whomever was the skull guy

Trish:make a Pita haiku
Dean:No Other pita, can satisfy my hunger, I am sandwichless.

Dean:Yeah, only instead of a skull, it would be like… an onion and other sandwich materials (skull goes in head, onions go in sandwiches).
Trish: A head…. of lettuce
Dean: Beautiful… and yet…. tragic.

-Dean